Woke up this morning to rain. Constant, heavy, drizzly rain. The kind that gets through to your bones and sticks there. The kind that makes your clothes sodden and adds ten pounds to any frame. Rain. What do we do well in Wales? Hills. Rain.
I know we do singing and food and sheep and views well too. But today we are specialising in rain . The hills are yet to come.
Thank fully I hadn't left too many miles til Cardiff - about ten to be precise. A very welcome short journey, with fingers crossed for flat and quiet.
Went downstairs for breakfast. Phyll gave me a warm welcome and regaled me with her b & b stories, what a laugh! A young looking seventy year old woman telling tales in her fantastic south-Walian accent.... good enough to make you spill/spit your coffee. I did both (dream guest). Bless her, she apologised! 'I fell in love with him at the door' was how she started. She didn't stop.
'I fell in love with him at the door...he was that 'an'some. There he stood, jumper, shorts bare feet, terrible 'an'some he was, I fell in love with him there and then. "Come in", I says. In he came. He looks me up and down and says, "I want to kiss your feet". "Don't be daft" I say, "I want to kiss your feet". Well, that was a bit odd. So I took him upstairs. When you do your meetings they say to you, let the customer in the room first, you go in second then you've got a way out see? Well, he turns on me, "I want to kiss your feet, let me kiss your feet". I was sixty five. "No" I says, threw him out. Couldn't be doing with that. All by myself in the house, him going on about my feet. Well, I sent him on his way. Turns out he headed for another place up the road. Says the same thing to the woman there, but her son was there, he threw him out and called the police. They never found him. But, I had to laugh, the next week in Take A Break magazine there was this article. About a man who liked feet, 'foot fetishist' they called him! I never! I cut it out and sent it to her up the road!
Had a lovely birthday last week. Felt like a queen, got terrible spoilt. Lovely it was. Went to a Mexican restaurant. Had a nice meal. Bit different, like. At the end of the meal they brought me a glass. "Drink this", they say, "don't smell it, just drink it". Well, drank it. Turns out it was tequila, burns something terrible going down! Awful. They gave me a bit of lemon and some salt, but they didn't tell me waht to do with it. Imagine! "Ow" I says, "that burns". The waiter, only about twenty , good looking lad. I said to him, "I thought you were nice, but I've gone right off you now". They were all laughing. Laughing they was. Me in my sombrero.
Had a woman here once. American she was. Street wise. Big lady. Come all the way from America to meet a man she'd found on the internet. Caerphilly man, would you ever? They came in together. Well, he was the smallest man. Smallest man in the world! "He'll pay but he's not staying" she said. And he did. She told me they'd met on the internet. Middle-aged lady she was. Had spent her life looking after her parents. "Thought it was time I did something for me" she said. But here? From America? Long way. Anyway, she went to her room. Next thing, door bell goes. I open it. there's a big lady there, enormous she was, huge. "Hello" I says. "Can I have a word with....?" She asks me. Oh no, I'm thinking. Here's trouble! "You'll have to do it here" I told her, "in the dining room". So they start talking. All I can hear is this Welsh woman "He's not thinking straight.... he's obsessed with you". Turns out he was married! Would you credit it? "I hope it hasn't spoilt your view of Caerphilly". The wife says. What's that got to do with Caerphilly, I'd like to know?!'
Wandered into town with my pump (I'd needed to put a bit of air in the tyres but hadn't been able to use it) and mile-o-meter (new battery). Found a Castle Street Cycles, where nice guy Steve changed the fitting so I could use it on my new (never had before) kind of tyre valves. Went back to the b & b. It was still raining but not quite so heavily, decided to set off. Pumped up the back tyre. NO! Little piece at end of valve broke off as I removed pump. Had just pumped up front tyre, checked to see if same thing had happened. It had. What a numpty! Back tyre suddenly deflates itself at rate of knots. NO! Wheeled bike round to nice guy Steve in bike shop. Open door (sheepishly)...
Me: Erm, hi. got a bit of a problem. Pumped up the back tyre with the pump you sorted. Broke of the end of the valve. Back tyre now deflated, I don't want to change it and pump up the new tyre only for it to happen again to my spare inner tube.
N-G-Steve: (kindly) Did you? Don't worry, it happens. You have to be really careful with it, otherwise you can break it.
Me: Am I dull (another word for daft) or is the pump not so good?
N-G-S: Well, (diplomatically) its a bit crap, I always use one with a flexible nozzle, that way it doesn't matter if you move it around.
Me: Erm....in that case I should probably tell you I've broken the front one too!
N-G-S: No? (starts laughing)
Me: That'll be two inner tubes and a pump with a flexible nozzle please and you can take this pump (old one) and chuck it.
What a nice guy. He changed both tyres. So, while I was there I got him to check my brakes, oil my chain and fiddle with my gears. All that for twelve quid.
Finally set off. To cut a LONG story short. Missed turning, pushed bike up v long, v steep hill, realised I'd gone wrong, turned round. Found turning. Pushed bike up second v long, v steep hill. Reached top, road was closed. Still raining. Found workmen, asked how I could rejoin route. They told me to go back down second v long, v steep hill and to re-climb first v. long, v steep hill, then turn right.
Through gritted teeth I did, by the time I reached top of first hill (and third climbed) for the second time I was muttering (strangely in a South Wales accent), 'I didn't buy a bike to ride it, oh no, I bought a bike to push round the streets of Caerphilly.'
Saw a b-road, turned right, checked map, asked for directions and finally found Cardiff.
In summary - left b and b at 10am. Travelled ten miles. First five miles took me (including pumping and trip to bike shop) 4 hours. Second five miles took me 35 minutes. The Gods were smiling on me though as I'd only planned to do ten miles today so I could have a look round Cardiff.
Met two friends, Journo-Lad and Head-Curfer this eve. Caused a small sensation at my super-glam (and super-cheap) b & b by meeting two blokes in quick succession in one evening. 'Just friends' I explained to my Polish hostess as she eyed me suspiciously.Went out and has three delicious courses to eat.
So, three's the charm. Three stories from Phyll, three problems in a day, three courses to eat. I was thinking, two friends met, will I accidentally meet a third today, but I didn't. Three threes is enough.
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